A couple of months ago – I wrote a post about Common Dude to Man Rites of Passage that every man must go through in Life as he transitions into manhood. The list wasn’t necessarily EVERYTHING that a guy goes through – but again, vice versa – something that every MAN eventually experiences.
In an offline conversation about the post, someone asked me, “What would this list look like for a Woman?”
To be honest – I didn’t know (I’m not a Lady, so… O_o), but I had a feeling who might have a pretty good idea… Enter Jennifer Baker – the (attractive and) highly contemplative creative muscle behind a blog that I’ve come to think of as the female equivalent to GentlemanREDUX – MindOfADiva.com.
Check out what she has to say in this guest post (hopefully the first of many interactions between our sites) that we’re gracious she offered to write-up in response to what the “Rites of Passage” look like for a Woman…
*** Begin Jennifer***
Going from a teenaged girl into being a woman is an exciting and unnerving time as we try to define ourselves and understand the world around us. There are times when the process can be overwhelming, hard, or tedious – but in the end it all makes us stronger. Once we come out on the other side we see how every step made us the woman we were born to be.
In Our Skin: The first step towards womanhood is becoming comfortable with who we are inside and out. As adolescents our focus is on the masses and trying to fit in so that we don’t stand out for being different. Now that we are out of “that” phase, it’s time to come to terms with who we are and appreciate what makes us an individual. By taking this step we not only get to know ourselves better – but we also get to learn what we, and those around us, stand for.
Accept Your Beauty: Once we are able to accept who we are on the inside, then we can come to terms with our appearance on the outside.
A lot of girls feel this way, but a Woman will eventually get beyond it.
Our hair, shape, lips, and other features make us unique and one of a kind. While the world has its own perception of what beauty is, we have to remember that true beauty is what we see in the mirror. Accept the curves and beauty marks and walk with confidence knowing that those things make you beautiful.
Miss Independent: Nothing beats being out on your own and in control, but this freedom comes with a price tag. As women, we work to maintain our lifestyles and pay our bills. While it may be trendy to have someone else take care of the bills, there’s a great sense of satisfaction that comes with doing it yourself. A true independent woman can take care of herself and her expenses, because she would rather be self-sufficient than depend on anyone else.
Pursue Our Dreams: So many people live regrets about dreams they never pursued. In order for us not to go down that same road we chase our goals. No matter if that means going to school, working multiple or dead-end jobs, and keeping odd hours – we find a way to make what we want happen. One way or another we are determined to go for ours and ensure our happiness.
A Few Good Women: If you think that finding a good guy is hard, think about finding a true friend. As we get older we discover that it’s better to have real friends around us than people who are there for their own benefits.
Once we find the ladies who…
- Have our back,
- Are trustworthy,
- Are good influences,
- And are supportive
we can rest assured that we have found the right group of girlfriends.
Mind on Our Money: After we graduate high school we are bombarded with applications for credit cards and that’s when it all begins. Now, simply managing our money is a piece of the larger financial puzzle that we are now responsible for managing. We have to learn about loans, credit cards, mortgages, credit scores and how to maintain them. To take care of all this we need the right resources (and these days the right bank), so that we can progress and one day retire comfortably. (Personally I suggest reading Suze Orman’s The Money Book for the Young, Fabulous, and Broke)
Good-bye to the List: Anyone can list the characteristics that they want their man to have, but the challenge comes when it’s time to find him. As we become wiser women we begin to understand the logic of dating and dealing with the opposite sex. This means that we start to look at our list in more realistic terms and what values matter the most to us. Then we try to find someone that matches those few points instead of a long list.
Goodbye.
Losing the Game: When we are serious about finding an honest and stable relationship we do not put up with men that are not serious or [playing] games. This includes booty calls, men that can’t commit, cheaters, and men that play with our emotions. Not only do we know that they are not good for us, but we are also aware that we can’t settle for that as we pursue something real.
Finding our Boo: With all of our friends and Facebook pals getting engaged and married, it’s natural to wonder when our time will come and if we will ever find love. The hard part is not stressing over it, and letting love find us instead of putting all of our energy into finding a guy. Doing this won’t get us “the guy” – it will only help us find a substitute. So the best thing to do is be patient, and make sure that when love does find us that we are a complete person and ready for it.
*** End Jennifer***
A Dallas native, Jennifer attended and graduated from Texas State University with a bachelor’s degree in 2009. In college she studied Mass Communications with the dream of becoming a writer and developing into a published author and public speaker. During her collegiate career she wrote for her school’s newspaper and even had a front page story.
While in her last semester, Jennifer created an entertainment blog to learn the basics of blogging, but then she sought something more meaningful (than entertainment to blog about). A year later the idea of creating a blog geared towards young women and their concerns turned into the blog Mind of a Diva. She currently maintains the blog, and works to further expand its reach. Jennifer has also written for various blogs throughout the country.
When Jennifer is not working on her personal blog she is spending time with her family, friends, and shopping.
